Filler 3: Huedekaiser and the Dunkmaster

6 Jul

Once upon a battle, down at summoner’s rift,

There was a warrior, with a special gift.

All the champions around him, he would slay,

Never once regretting jumping into the fray.

Any time someone thought that they were superior,

He would come right and say “Your skills are inferior.”

And so it continued, day after day,

Getting chosen for battle, there was no other way.

Our hero was lonely, for none matched his bravery,

When he was alone, his life felt like slavery.

Then one day, while fighting a battle,

Against a large moo-cow that was nothing but cattle,

He saw a new enemy, armored and large,

Made of just metal, the size of a barge.

The dunkmaster wanted to see him in action,

This large metal man held some strange attraction.

As he watched the stranger battle with ease,

He knew that he had a new love to please.

As the battle raged on, long into the day,

The new champ of the league merely said “hue hue hue”.

Our hero was glad, and wanted to meet him,

But knew that he’d wait, for his chances were grim.

He sought out the gem knight who knew of these urges,

To help him find a way to past the scourges.

Upon finding his helper, and asking for aid,

Taric looked like he would throw a parade!

“So you want my help to get the master of metal,

To look at you and think that he’s willing to settle?”

Our hero said yes, that was all he desired,

And Taric could not help but come up inspired.

“Here is the plan, you must follow it closely,

To win his affections, even if they’re grossly.”

He outlined his plan for the lovestruck dunkmaster,

Who listened closely to avoid a disaster.

The very next day, on the fields of battle,

He went up to the metal man, and gave him a rattle

He said, “I am the dunkmaster, my surname is Yi,

I wish that you would have an audience with me.”

The Master of Metal looked down at the man,

“What do you want from me, I’m getting a tan.”

Yi looked downhearted, but saw his new master,

Taric watching from the bushes, encouraging him faster.

“Well, master of metal, I’ve seen you make war,

Now I want to know if you have space in your heart for one fighter more.”

The large metal man, was stunned and silent,

The whole battle had stopped, and none were violent.

Everyone sat there, awaiting his answer,

When he said, “Of course I would have you, you fine Wuju lancer.”

The rift was ablaze, all happy and dancing,

The cause of love was always worth advancing.

I hope you have learned a lot from this tale,

Two that are different, won’t necessarily fail.

-Tale Master

I will hopefully have one more thing up for you later today, and starting tomorrow, Chapter 1 of the War for Freljord should be up! Hope you’re doing well summoners.

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3 Responses to “Filler 3: Huedekaiser and the Dunkmaster”

  1. Scarlex July 9, 2012 at 12:32 am #

    Subtle gay Taric reference is subtle.

    • League Tales July 9, 2012 at 9:42 am #

      We love Taric and support him no matter what life decisions he makes :).

      • Scarlex July 10, 2012 at 12:19 am #

        As long as he stays fabulous 🙂

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